They Grow up so fast

Every time I look at them I see something so much smaller and more fragile than they have become. Then one of them says something profound, deep, intelligent, and mature,and I am floored by the person that my tiny precious baby has become.

When do you come to terms with the idea that this tiny being that lived inside of you for 9-10 months is no longer the dependent needy lovely little child and has grown into an independent thinking being?


This week I had to come to terms with my eldest becoming the young man that he wants to be, not necessarily the future that I envisioned for him but one that he will seek to expand on his own. The British school system that my son is in is so very different from the American system that I grew up in.

In my high school we had required "core" classes that every student had to take, some had choices but most did not. Then every year you had a few "elective" courses that you could choose from.

In my eldest boy's school they get two core classes, Math and English. For the next two years he gets to choose all of his "elective" courses. The biggest problem for me is that they don't have the kind of electives that we had. My elective courses were things like theater, band, choir, driver's ed etc. His "elective" courses were things like History, Geography, Sciences, etc. To me these are not electives, they are core necessary classes. In addition, there are just not enough students to justify them taking all of the classes that they need.

And the children are suppose to choose these courses. Will and I had sat down with him and discussed the options available and gave our suggestions for what we thought would be a well balanced and workable schedule. And I must be honest when I say that I am worried about his liberal studies. Because William has decided what he wants to do with his life. And he is working all of his classes and all of his activities towards that goal. Which is a good thing and a bad thing. First, I remember deciding at that age what I wanted to be, and being told at several points (never by my mother though...) that I would never be able to do that. So the fact that he has set his goal and is working towards it is great to me. However, I am really worried that he will be limiting his understanding and scope of the world if he decides to do this one thing and precludes all others.

Trying to balance between being supportive, giving him his independence, and fostering his growth is really difficult. But I sat down with him and Will and we discussed all of the options and made the decisions based on his future hopes, his preferences, and our input. Taking a look at his schedule though, he is going to be a seriously tired young man for the next two years.

Not that the choices were very good, because for every class that he wanted he had to give up one that might also help his future. But here is what he has for the next two years.

His core classes are Math and English (we hope he gets English Lit but he will probably not because he just doesn't enjoy writing... but we do know he will get into advanced math because he is just that good.)
For his elective courses he has
Biology
Chemistry
Physics
DT (design Technology, which is a bit like drafting and planning projects)
Computer Science (programming, not the baser course ICT which is understanding word and power point... what a useless class that would be, so I am happy they are offering CS).
and French.

Notice what I notice? No liberal studies. Nothing. He had to give up Music to take Chemistry, Art for DT, and History to take Physics. He wants the sciences and to be honest he will do better in them than the Liberal Studies courses. So we have to augment. I will be buying history, social studies, geography and American Lit books when we are back in the states, because I just don't see how he is going to get a grasp on the greater world understanding with this load. We have already got a music tutor for all three of the kids (and they are doing fantastic actually), and we have Sister Wendy's art videos to watch, plus a planned trip to Rome. If we can't garner a little culture from Italy, then there is something wrong with us.

I don't entirely understand the British system (or if this is even the British system?!) but when he leaves this school he will have an IB and will hopefully be as ready for college as I was at least. Which isn't to say that I was all that ready, so I guess he will be ok. But it is so hard to watch my little boy grow up.
Don't get me started on the other two. They are suppose to be smaller than he is aren't they?